The longest and most important relationship you will ever have is the one you hold with yourself. Every other bond—whether with a partner, a child, a friend, or a colleague—mirrors this inner connection. If your relationship with yourself is strong, compassionate, and nurturing, it will ripple outward into every other area of your life. But if you’ve neglected it, forgotten about it, or even turned against yourself, no amount of love from others can truly fill that gap. Today, let’s explore how to return home—to yourself.
Most of us spend our days obsessing over other people. Does he love me? Did I annoy her again? Why won’t they call? Why do I always give so much and get so little back? Our minds spin in endless loops about others—what they think, what they do, whether they will stay or leave.
There’s a well-known saying: people come into your life for a reason, a season, or a lifetime. The majority fall into the “reason” or “season” categories. Relationships naturally fade, sometimes painfully so. Only a rare few remain for a lifetime. But among those rare bonds, the one that must always take priority is the relationship with yourself. Because the way you treat yourself determines the quality of every other relationship you’ll ever have.
Too often, our relationships with others operate at the level of personality rather than genuine love. Personality says: I expect something from you, and I’ll give something back. But if you stop giving, then we have a problem. What we trade can be love, safety, money, sex, or even social status.
Yet here’s the truth: no one can give you what you deny yourself. Someone may shower you with affection, constantly remind you how much they love you—but if you don’t love yourself, their words will skim across the surface of your heart without ever sinking in. Another person can offer money, protection, or gifts, but if you feel poor or unsafe within, those offerings won’t change the way you feel. This is why your relationship with yourself is everything. Without it, the love and security from others can never truly land.
So, what kind of relationship do you have with yourself? Sadly, many people are their own harshest critics, even enemies. Instead of acting like a supportive coach—someone who points out mistakes honestly but with encouragement, compassion, and unshakable faith—they tear themselves down with cruelty and shame.
Often, this comes from what we learned in childhood. If parents criticized, belittled, or lashed out at us, that treatment becomes familiar. As adults, we repeat it toward ourselves, because it feels like “home.” Self-love, self-compassion, and self-care may then feel unnatural or even undeserved.
But nothing is fixed. Through conscious practice, you can re-learn how to treat yourself with kindness. Remember this: people around you mirror the way you treat yourself. If you constantly judge and belittle yourself, others will unconsciously reflect that energy back. If you respect yourself deeply, people will meet you with respect.
So, where do you start? With awareness.
Every emotion is preceded by a thought. Start observing your inner dialogue. What do you say to yourself, and how do you say it? Notice the tone, the criticism, the hidden assumptions. Then begin to consciously shift it. Ask yourself: Where did I learn to speak to myself this way? Does this belief still serve me?
And then choose new words. Treat yourself like the child that still lives inside you—because no matter if you are 30, 50, or 70, that inner child still longs for love, tenderness, and support. Don’t look for this outside; only you can give it to yourself. In our center, we often encourage clients to repeat a simple affirmation throughout the day:
“I, [your name], love and accept myself.”
For example: “I, Marianna, love and accept myself.”
Say it upon waking, before sleep, while driving, washing dishes, or taking a shower. You can also speak gently to yourself during the day: “Hey kiddo, I love you. You’re doing great. I’m proud of you.” Hug yourself, too—it may sound unusual, but it’s powerful.
It is hard to live peacefully with yourself if you still carry anger, regret, or hatred for mistakes of the past. Yet those so-called “mistakes” are not failures—they are lessons, stepping-stones in the school of life. Without them, there would be no growth.
If you cannot forgive yourself, you will struggle to forgive others. Unforgiven wounds create energy blockages that, over time, may even manifest as illness. Self-forgiveness is not indulgence—it is medicine.
The relationship with yourself is not something you “finish.” You will never reach a moment when you can say: Okay, I love myself enough, my work here is done. Life will continue to test and deepen your self-love. If this topic calls to you, I highly recommend these books:
The Power Is Within You by Louise Hay
A Return to Love by Marianne Williamson
Self-love is not a one-time project. It is the lifelong foundation for every other relationship you’ll ever experience.
About the Author:
Marianna oversees the daily operations of The Dr. Wanda Pratnicka Center, skillfully advising staff members on guiding clients through the spirit removal process. Her efforts extend beyond management; she is dedicated to raising awareness about the phenomenon of spirit possession, utilizing various platforms including events, books, and digital media. In her leisure time, Marianna delights in gardening, immerses herself in reading, and explores new natural wonders.
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ADDITIONAL RESOURCES:
1. You can find more information about common symptoms of spirit attachment / possession here:
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